Sunday, August 16, 2009

Overheard In A Stadium Bathroom

I went to a pre-season NFL football game last night. At one point I ducked into a men's bathroom at the stadium and, while I was standing second-in-line in front of a string of occupied urinals, I overheard the following conversation between a huge guy wearing an official team jersey who was hovering right behind me in line (and who sprayed beer as he talked), and a much smaller man in a baseball cap and goatee who was at one of the urinals.

Huge Guy: "Hey 'Tiny'! Shake that thing....that rascal........'Tiny'!.......Shake it!"

Small Guy (over his shoulder): "Are you talkin' to me?"

Huge Guy: "Yeah! Come on 'Tiny,' get that 'little dangler' movin'. Let's get a move-on 'Little Dangler.' Come on...."

Small Guy: "You're looking at my thing: why are you looking at my thing?"

(long pause)

Huge Guy: "Aren't you a season ticket holder?"

Small guy: "No."

(shorter pause)

Fist fight begins.....

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