Maybe I'm just superstitious. But I feel like there are some words that should never, ever be put together, because, if they ever were, the mere speaking of them, like a sorcerer's incantation, might unwittingly unleash hellish demons or cosmic terrors on the Earth.
It's in that spirit that I encourage you never to speak this phrase aloud: Arby's Artisinal Melts.
And in that same vein, I beg you not to even move your lips while reading this phrase: How To Eat Vegan At Red Lobster.
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